On World Mental Health Day, we take a look at the rise and rise of Men’s Circles that is helping men open up about issues with the power of brotherhood

When Pasco Ashton first sat down in a men’s circle, he was skeptical. Would it be another one of those exercises in vulnerability that left him feeling more awkward than engaged? Yet what unfolded was profoundly transformative—a space where men could speak with raw honesty, listen intently, and delve into realms of self-awareness often avoided elsewhere. “It all started very organically,” says Ashton, founder of Men’s Circles in 2019. “I was on my own journey—doing retreats, looking inward—and I realized I wasn’t the only one questioning what it meant to be a man.”

What began as mere curiosity has since burgeoned into a nationwide network. From the coastal stretches of Cornwall to the highlands of Scotland, men are gathering weekly—sometimes online, sometimes in-person—to create a unique environment defined by open dialogue free from judgment. “We start every session by reminding each other that all emotions are welcome,” Ashton explains. “It’s about creating a space where men don’t have to fix anything, just show up and be real.”

Breaking the stigma of “Man Up”

At first glance, the concept of men sharing their feelings might seem trivial, but it challenges centuries of conditioning. Men are often taught to equate vulnerability with weakness. Phrases like “man up” and “boys don’t cry” foster a culture in which acknowledging emotional struggles is deemed shameful. A report from the Institute of Mental Health reveals that 68% of men feel the need to hide their emotions, a phenomenon that creates not only personal distress but societal ramifications as well. “Society has built this idea that being a man means being self-reliant and stoic,” says Ashton. “But that’s not strength—that’s isolation. And isolation is killing men.”

Statistics reveal the grim repercussions of this isolation: men are significantly less likely to seek mental health help than women, despite facing higher rates of suicide and substance abuse. The circles emerge as vital spaces where men can candidly discuss their struggles without fear. “We need to break the cycle that keeps men quiet,” emphasizes Dr. Emily Winters, a clinical psychologist who studies male mental health. “Men’s Circles provide a format that allows them to connect in ways traditional therapy often fails to facilitate.”

“It made me realise I wasn’t alone”

Peter Phillip, a trained facilitator within the Men’s Circles movement, knows the profound impact of this new form of connection. His journey began not in a circle but at a Radical Honesty retreat. “There were about twenty of us,” he recalls, “and it struck me how many women had shared bad experiences with men. It made me think about the kind of man I wanted to be.” Through his personal journey of discovery and his work in the circles, Phillip has witnessed firsthand how many men grapple with profound feelings of loneliness and disconnection.

“I wanted to help create spaces where men could do the kind of inner work that makes them better friends, partners, and fathers,” he states. What started as simply joining a group led him to facilitate his own circles in less than six months—the urgency was palpable.

How the circles work

Every session in a men’s circle is meticulously structured to foster trust and openness. It begins with “the agreements”—principles that establish confidentiality and respect. Facilitators encourage men to rate how they feel on a scale from 0 to 10 during a “check-in” and add three words describing their emotional state.

“This gentle start sets the stage for reflection,” Phillip explains. “Just vocalizing those feelings can be a big step.” Following the check-in, a grounding exercise calms the nerves, allowing participants to transition from daily life into a space for honest dialogue.

• Check-in: Participants rate their emotional state.
• Grounding exercise: A brief moment of reflection and calm.
• Warm-up question: Topics that invite deeper conversation.

The approach not only allows men to ease into the conversation but also establishes a culture of vulnerability and accountability. “The structure gives permission for honesty,” Phillip adds. “You start with baby steps, and before long, you’re sharing things you’ve never voiced.”

Why traditional therapy doesn’t always fit

While conventional therapy remains essential, many men find it hard to engage with traditional models. As studies show, these services often rely heavily on verbal emotional expression, which does not resonate with all men. “Some men just can’t relate to sitting in a clinical room and talking about feelings,” Ashton notes. “But give them a space where they can speak to other men, with no agenda and no judgment—that’s where they begin to open up.”

Experts suggest that future therapies for men could benefit from action-oriented approaches, integrating physical activities or interactions alongside typical talk therapies. “We’ve had guys join our circles who’d never have set foot in a therapist’s office,” Phillip notes. “Now, they’re having open, emotional conversations every week. That’s huge.”

Changing the narrative

The rise of Men’s Circles signals a larger cultural shift—a movement aimed at redefining masculinity in the modern world. More facilitators are emerging, founding both in-person and virtual circles across the UK. “The goal is to make this as normalized as going to the gym,” asserts Ashton. “Training your mind and emotional awareness should be as common as physical fitness.”

As men become more willing to publicly confront their vulnerabilities, the transformative effects are visible. “I’ve seen men arrive completely shut down,” Ashton reflects. “Six months later, they’re more confident, more connected—not just to others, but to themselves.”

The collective impact challenges the long-held notion of masculinity that equates strength with silence. “Real courage is being honest,” Ashton concludes. For men like Peter Phillip, the message is clear: “It’s not just okay to talk about what you’re going through; it’s vital. Once you realize you’re not alone, everything shifts. You stop pretending—and you start living.”

Source: mensfitness.co.uk